money is our god

Do you think its time to spice things up in bed with your spouse?

She sat there huddled down by the Orchids, her bare feet sideways as she lay in the dirt. A few trees loomed above and swayed gently in the warm breeze whispering verses with their rustle. I Looked out from the patio I saw a group of robed men crossing the field. They chanted what sounded like commodity indexes.

A steady fellowship was forming around the temple that we built in the backyard. Andre sat in the distance with a pad of sketch paper. He was planning on making an addition to facilitate our growth. He sketched the lines that he hoped to build. They jutted out of the pyramidic structure like huge legs.

I looked down at Mary in the flowers. Things had been difficult for us since the visions came. We spoke with less frequency, but she stayed on the ranch. She wouldn't tell me what she thought of all this, but I knew she thought that we were all a little crazy.

There was a time when all of this was just a whisper, but now it was very real. The bankers and accountants came. Things changed.

Force all girls to submit your sexy discipline!

When your organism sending help signals.

Listen up maggots. I am not your mother. I am not your father. I am your Sergeant and for the next six months you will listen to me. I don't care if you came from a single celled boys school or my Aunt Mary's retention pond, here I give the orders. Do you want to evolve? Do you want to be sexy? When I'm done with you pieces of shit, you are going to be the sexiest sons of a bitches that ever infected someone's intestinal track. Am I clear?


You find something funny about the way I put my makeup on, single cell Joker?

Paris Hilton

This message has been processed by Symantec AntiVirus.

card.scr was infected with the malicious virus Trojan.Pandex and has been deleted because the file cannot be cleaned.

I don't really feel like writing a Paris Hilton joke. Just imagine one in its place. You won't have a hard time.

hi from Lilly

Hi,
i am here sitting in the internet caffe. Found your email and
decided to write. I am 25 y.o.girl.
I have a picture if you want. No need to reply here as
this is not may email. Write me at ...

Dear Lilly,

I am pleased and frightened that you have found my email at the internet caffe. Is a caffe anything like a cafe? I don't know! Maybe you meant to say you are sitting in the internet gaffe. If that is the case, sitting in a subspace internet error zone all ethereal and wild, you are probably not real. Are you an anomalous AI looking for emails so that you can make friends, maybe even find love? If so, I hope you are pretty because I have standards. I like that you are 25, but I don't like that you abbreviated y.o. How could I possibly assume that means year old? Especially because you did not put a space after the o. It could mean youoygirl which we all know is the internet gaffe demon that hunts for you men's email addresses in a bid to eat their souls. No thanks sister. No thanks.

No need to reply here. I've pretty much decided that you are the devil.

Peace

Ring Ring, The phone

Well listen up...stop it right now....because those dreams can be a reality.

First of all, asking a man to immediately stop dreaming is absurd. The poor guy doesn't have to wake up until 7:OOam.

Let's take a vertical step back to 3O,OOOft for perspective;
You know how you have spent countless hours wishing you had it easier? Yep.

Tired of hearing family and friends telling you to give up on your pipe dreams? Oh yeah.

Myself and others do this every day, bringing in 15OO to 35OO right to our door. I'm starting to see what he did there.

All this guy wants is to have me call, listen and decide in that order. Were talking about a payout between 15OO-35OO monies. That's right James Cramer (star of Iron Man), fifteen capital-oh capitol-oh. Now there's a grammatical price combination worth smashing one's hypothetical cliché office coffee mug over.

Sure, this potential investment of my time might seem outlandish, but he's dead-on about pipe dreams and this is the deal maker. If only my family and friends knew the 2nd to last pipe gets you to Cloud Zone.

Seductive proposal for you shlang

The size of your pal will hypnotize all females around you.

August in Maine, on the seaboard was the first time that I saw him. Planks striped along walkway buckled, seemed to lead me there. I found myself in an alley, the doll district and that is when I heard him call me.

"Joe", he bellowed. "What is it that you want more than anything else?"

"To be loved."

A shape rose from the shadows, a puppet, but it moved on its own. "My name is Shlang. I can make all your dreams come true."

He told me of his powers. The ages that he had seen, wars, death, his fate. He would give me all that I asked for. I ran like hell.


Come back, Joe.

Watching the watch dial

Rolex logo etched at 6 o'clock position on watch dial.

Remember the good old days of Indiglo? Ah yes, a warm summer night or a cold winter evening (in which your car had broken down in the middle of Montana) having the comfort of Indiglo to answer the lifelong question, "What time is it?" and "Call triple A.", well scrap that, because this watch will have nothing of it. Rolex has one-upped themselves, not the consumer, with the latest design of replacing the six o'clock number with the Rolex crown. Fittingly enough for King Edward the 3rd, twice a day there is now a King o'clock. There's also mention of automatic movement, a diver's extension to watch bracelet, and steelinox clasp. I don't know about you, but I'm astounded.

You're more than welcome to become hooked on this feelin'.